Home Birth/Hospital Birth

Since I found out I was pregnant I've been trying to decide where to have this baby!

My labour with Noah was good, he was back to back but it was 8 hours start to finish with about 50 minutes pushing. Nothing to shabby about that. The contractions were not what I expected, as he was back to back the pain was completely in my spine so it took a while for me to realise I was in labour. The spurts of amniotic fluid gushing down my leg with each contraction gave it away though! I had wanted a water birth. Our hospital has this amazing Midwifery Led Unit, with huge pools and massive individual rooms with en-suits. I went into one of the huge rooms, got my gas and air going, got on all fours and..........couldn't move! The pain in my back and bum was so much that I felt I could not move from that position at all. The midwife filled the pool for me but I just couldn't move and ended up going without. I loved being in the MLU. After Noah was born I was pretty much left to it, they came in to check I was feeding Noah alright (my mother will tell you I wasn't at all and the midwife wasn't much help, but I wasn't worries and it all turned out fine!) and I didn't really see them again. With a little stubbornness on my part, they let me go home that evening.

Everything was exactly as I would have liked it and I think this is what has made my decision so hard this time round. I know if this baby is born later in the day, or just having a midwife with a different mentality, I was likely to be told to stay overnight. If everything goes fine there is no way I want to go without my bed and without Thomas! Then there's the fact that everyone says having a home birth is "amazing"! However, I still really wanted to have a water birth and the idea of having a pool at home seemed like such a faff!

There is one other factor that really has been the hardest to overcome. I am not usually so certain and unchanging in feeling about things like this, but I guess childbirth is enough to create strong feelings in me! At our doctors surgery there are two midwives who are part of a wider team of 8. At the beginning of my pregnancy I had some issues and ended up speaking to the same midwife every time. She was unhelpful and made me feel stressed out by the situation. It was only after I had my first actual appointment, with the other midwife, I found out there was a very simple solution to my problem that the other midwife never considered. I have managed to see the lovely midwife the whole way through my pregnancy except once recently. I went in for my appointment and discovered I was seeing the other one. Yet again she left me feeling confused, stressed, bad about myself and angry! The big problem is that if I have a home birth she may be the one on call. I had to decide whether I was willing to risk a 1 in 8 chance of her being the one at my birth, a time when I want to feel relaxed and in control.

It was this birth story on the Gas and Air Blog, that convinced me to go for the home birth. I have reserved a birthing pool and am picturing candles, music, meditation podcasts, dim lighting and complete calm! Obviously I have a 1 in 8 chance that I will have the opposite but that is a risk I am willing to take!

So the midwife is coming to my house on Thursday to write our birth plan and do all the paperwork for a home birth. My blood pressure has been a little high so as long as that is ok on Thursday we are good to go!

Oh, and it had better be soon!!!!

Bx